What Might Have Been In The Life Of A Serial Killer - Creating Hope In Invisible Trauma
What Might Have Been In The Life Of A Serial Killer - Creating Hope In Invisible Trauma
He was a little wild and energetic as he walked into the classroom each day. Rough around the edges, one might say. To most educators and the other adults in the school he was a distraction at best, a hopeless problem child at worst. They couldn’t see the truth, though.
My dad’s life changed tremendously when his mother met and married her second husband, Arnold. Arnold was a charismatic personality that loved hosting parties and entertaining. It was easy for him to converse and relate to neighbors and coworkers, so people had no idea something so wrong could be happening behind closed doors.
While in elementary school my dad, Mitchell Sims, was introduced to pornographic images and videos by his step dad, Arnold. That soon transitioned into being forced to touch his siblings, mother, and step dad. Arnold appeared to be a model citizen until he got drunk. And he loved drinking.
Arnold realized that the children in the household were less combative during those episodes of abuse and rape when they, themselves were drunk, and so he began providing alcohol to the kids. My dad stated that by the time he arrived at middle school, he was a drunk. He was conditioned to realize that alcohol and drugs numbed pain, so when things got stressful, painful, or difficult, he’d drink. Things were often stressful, painful, and difficult.
Arnold was also a physically abusive man. Beating and punching the children until blood ran down their backs or faces were regular occurrences. My dad was often told that he was trash and that he’d never amount to anything. Arnold was very convincing, too, because my dad believed every word.
As the kids got older, the abuse became more grotesque. The touching and fondling turned into full-on intercourse. Forced to have sexual relations with his sibling and his mom for the viewing pleasure of Arnold, my dad was experiencing graphic, horrible, unmentionable trauma regularly. And then he’d wake up and go to school the next day.
My dad believed he was worthless. He didn’t care about himself, even to the point of extinguishing cigarettes on his flesh, calling himself the human ashtray. So when he was twenty-five years old, and he was cheated out of a bonus at work, he lost it. In 1985 my dad walked into a pizza chain that he had previously worked at and killed two innocent men while robbing the restaurant. He fled to California where he killed another employee of that restaurant chain before tying up two more employees in the freezer.
My dad, from coast-to—coast was now known as the Domino’s Killer. He was arrested in Las Vegas on Christmas Day of 1985. He was later convicted and sentenced to death by execution in both South Carolina and California.
What if someone had noticed. What if someone saw that this child wasn’t just a troubled nuisance, and wasn’t just problem child, but that there was something deeper going on. What if someone had cared more for the person rather than the curriculum? What if…
A real challenge emerges, then: How many people do we walk by every single day who carry invisible wounds? How often do we react to someone's actions without considering the deeper pain that might be driving them? If you’re a Christian, Jesus calls us to love with an awareness that goes beyond surface-level interactions. The world teaches us to judge behaviors, but Christ teaches us to seek the heart.
Seeing People as Jesus Sees Them
Throughout His ministry, Jesus demonstrated an unparalleled ability to see beyond a person’s outward behavior and into their true needs. One of the most powerful examples of this is found in John 4, where Jesus encounters the Samaritan woman at the well. On the surface, she was a woman living in sin, rejected by her community. But Jesus saw more. He saw her thirst for something deeper, her wounds, her shame—and He met her there with truth and compassion.
Likewise, in Luke 19, when Jesus calls out to Zacchaeus, the tax collector, He doesn't see just a corrupt man guilty of extortion. He sees a soul longing for redemption. While the crowd grumbled, Jesus extended an invitation that changed Zacchaeus’ life forever.
As followers of Christ, we are called to do the same. 1 Samuel 16:7 reminds us, “Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” If we truly want to be Christlike, we must intentionally look deeper than what people present on the outside.
Understanding the Science of Trauma and Behavior
Modern psychology supports what Scripture has already told us—people’s behaviors are often shaped by their experiences, especially traumatic ones. Trauma can rewire the brain, making individuals more reactive, defensive, or even withdrawn. Studies show that childhood abuse, neglect, or significant stress can lead to a heightened fight-or-flight response, meaning people may lash out or shut down, not because they are intentionally difficult, but because their brain has been shaped by past pain.
Understanding this should reshape how we respond to others. Instead of reacting in frustration or judgment, we should ask: “What happened to them?” rather than “What’s wrong with them?”
This perspective aligns with Colossians 3:12, which calls us to clothe ourselves “with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience.” When we encounter someone who is difficult, rude, or distant, we must train ourselves to pause and see beyond the behavior.
How Christians Can Show Intentional Love and Empathy
For the past two years, I’ve had the honor of working in a Title 1 middle school, overseeing the in-school suspension room. When students get in trouble, they come to me. Because of the insight I’ve gained from my father’s experiences—and in part, my own—I am intentional about showing compassion, love, friendship, and empathy to every student, even the so-called “bad” ones. It turns my stomach when I hear teachers yelling and raising their voices at these students, knowing that many of them endure this daily from abusers. Instead of helping these kids break free from cycles of pain, they’re reinforcing trauma, adding to the very stress, fear, and frustration that fuels their misbehavior in the first place.
This reality isn’t limited to schools. It plays out in every corner of life. We see and react to the road-rager, the homeless beggar, the prostitute, the grumpy church lady, the absent-minded cashier—all through the lens of our own expectations and assumptions. But this is dangerous, and I’d even go as far as saying it’s sinful. When we judge people without seeking to understand them, we fail to love as Christ loved. We become part of the problem rather than the solution.
Knowing that people carry hidden wounds, how can we respond in a way that aligns with Christ’s heart?
1. Be Quick to Listen, Slow to Judge
James 1:19 instructs, “Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry.” Often, people simply need to be heard. Taking the time to listen without immediately offering advice or judgment can be a profound act of love.
2. Extend Grace, Even When It’s Not Deserved
Jesus forgave those who nailed Him to the cross (Luke 23:34). If He could extend grace in His suffering, we can certainly extend grace to those who act out of their wounds. Our ability to love those who seem unlovable is a direct reflection of God’s grace in our own lives.
3. Look for the Lonely and Overlooked
In Matthew 25:40, Jesus says, “Whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.” That person sitting alone, the grumpy cashier, the irritable co-worker—they may be battling unseen pain. A kind word, a simple smile, or a moment of genuine interest in their life can be the very thing that lifts their spirit.
4. Ask God for Discernment
The Holy Spirit gives wisdom to those who ask (James 1:5). Pray daily for eyes to see people as Jesus does. Ask God to make you sensitive to those who need encouragement, healing, or simply someone to notice them.
5. Become a Safe Person
People who have been hurt often expect rejection. Being a consistent, safe person—someone who doesn’t lash out, gossip, or abandon them—can be a powerful testimony of Christ’s love. Proverbs 17:17 reminds us, “A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity.”
Loving Others Can Save Lives
One of the greatest tragedies is that so many people suffering from deep emotional pain believe they are alone. Suicide, self-harm, addiction, acts of rage—many of these struggles stem from feeling unseen and unloved. Our small acts of kindness, patience, and intentional love could literally save lives. Proverbs 18:21 reminds us that “The tongue has the power of life and death.” We can either speak words that bring healing or contribute to the pain people already carry.
A Challenge to Christians
We cannot be passive in our love. The world tells us to treat everyone the same, but Jesus calls us to meet people where they are. Some need tough love, but others need tenderness. Some need encouragement, while others need space to heal. Romans 12:15 instructs us to “Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn.” Loving people well requires discernment and intentionality.
So today, slow down. Ask God to give you eyes to see the people around you—not just their actions, but their hearts. You may never fully know someone’s struggles, but you can always choose to respond with love, just as Christ has done for you.
Because when we truly see people, we can change their world. And in doing so, we reflect the heart of our Savior.